Nothing makes me feel better when I’m ill than reading hp fan fiction :’) my favourite is Ron’s teenage daughter getting knocked up by Malfoy’s son…
"Then how, I hear you ask, do I find myself pregnant with his child?
Well, it’s a mixture of Firewhiskey and revenge. As most pregnancies are.”
"Oh god, why was I born into a nut house? Did I do something in a previous life to deserve this?
Was I HITLER???”
"“You’re cool when you’re drunk,” Malfoy slurred.
“D’you know what’s cooler…funk!” I exclaimed.
“You’re dead right there!” Malfoy agreed seriously.
“There’s nothing better than funk,” I said, bopping to the music.
“I agree,” said Malfoy, “I completely agree.”
“Play that funky music, white boy!” I yelled at him. “
"Seriously, why didn’t Uncle Harry and Mum and Dad just sit Voldemort down with a cup of tea all those years ago instead of going through all that Horcrux crap? Things would have been a lot easier. But maybe Voldemort just didn’t like tea."
"Couples are as common as STDs among slutty Hufflepuffs in the Potter house tonight."
Thank you Padfoot4eva, your beautiful words are an inspiration to us all and the day when penguin get off their fat butts and decide to publish your masterpiece, it will be a true victory.
I think Dumbledore agrees..